My Story

There are mountains beyond this mire...

Does “the story” matter? It is the backdrop for the journey in front of us all.  Our stories, however, are not our testimonies.  While our stories might be what have happened to us, both good and bad, joyous and traumatic, our testimonies are what God has done for us in the midst of our stories.  We must know our own stories because they inform our present lives.  What’s more, I am learning that we should never be ashamed of them.  It is essential, however, that we invite the Spirit of God into our stories, our lives and circumstances both inner and outer, so that His transforming presence can infuse them with truth–the truth of who we really are, the truth of who He really is,  and the truth of what He has done, is doing, and will do to restore us so that we experience a good and prosperous present and future.  This truth brings about transformation and healing.

My story? I’m a survivor of human trafficking.  I’m a survivor of childhood sexual abuse.  Both my parents have malignant psychiatric disorders, and I suppose I could say that I’ve survived them, too.  That’s a lot of darkness, huh? In an effort to pull myself up by my own bootstraps, I used to to shun “survivors” saying, “Surviving just means that you didn’t die.”  I don’t judge survivors anymore.  Why? Like it or not, I’m one of ‘em.  Secondly, surviving is the first step towards flourishing.  You’ve got to start somewhere, right?

While I have been force-fed a buffet of toxic crap at times in my life, I’ve also tasted glory, too.  There is a greater beauty to savor, something to revel in even, and that’s why I’m making my way out of the mire of mere surviving.  I am learning to flourish–taste the joy– because that is God’s purpose for our lives–to live and move and have our being in him, to love ourselves, and to love the people in our lives and communities.  I suppose I would also like to be transparent enough so that others will know that they are not alone.  And, perhaps, I’ll know that indeed I’m not alone either. This road out of the mire has been trod time and time again.  With that,  I invite you to take a few steps with me should you desire it.  I’d like to learn from you, too, because I have learned this–man and woman were not made to journey alone.

Shalom.