Tag: divorce

Rebooting for the New Year

One of the broader topics on this blog is mental health and how mental health is defined and experienced in different contexts.  The DSM-V has divided and sub-divided the human experience into so many diagnoses that I imagine that every human could find an…

The Betrayal of Disengagement: Reloaded

I wrote this post for another blog a little over a year ago, but I want to post it here, too, because I continue to get comments on this post–Affective Deprivation Disorder and Alexithymia in Marriage.  Out of hundreds of posts, that post is…

Does God Really Hate Divorce?

Why ask this question? Does it even matter? I’m asking the question because I’m going to attempt to answer it.  I’m also asking it because I have heard “God hates divorce” more times than I can count at this point, and I think that…

The Buffer and Rat Park

I went to therapy on Tuesday with a migraine. I have to pause for a moment and talk about migraines, pain, and trauma.  Whenever I have mentioned the nightmare known as The Migraine on any blog, well-meaning people have offered helpful comments.  I certainly want…

The Disgust Cycle in Healing

I want to address something that inevitably comes up during the healing process after a break-up or divorce particularly if your ex-partner was not a very nice person.  What do I mean by ‘not nice’? Well, my marriage ended for many little reasons much…

Saying No is Good

Saying ‘no’ is good.  I seem to rarely do it, but I’ve heard other people tell me this.  I am kidding.  Sort of. I really find out just how good saying ‘no’ is particularly when I said ‘yes’ but really wanted to say ‘no’.  Do you know…

Entitlement and Domestic Abuse

I am going to record this for a very specific reason. Sometimes people give something away in the moment, and that’s the moment that things crystalize.  That’s the insight that you needed to confirm your hypothesis.  That’s when you know that you were right….

Blame and Accountability

I don’t advocate going through divorce, but, should you submit yourself to the process with your whole self, it will mature you in ways you didn’t anticipate. How? Dealing with difficult emotions on the fly while developing insight at the same time.  I’ll let…

What Your Brain Knows

Hello, hello, hello! I apologize for my absence.  I have been recovering from not a small surgery, and I don’t think I remember half of September nor the beginning of October at all.  I found a stack of bills last night that I have…

Something Better

It has been really…something…for me to document my process of therapy and divorce on my blog.  The entire thing is out there for the world to see.  I did it, in part, for myself.  I process through writing.  I also did it so that…

Real Talk

Stress.  It doesn’t have to be a bad thing.  I keep telling myself that.  Stress is one of those buzz words in our culture that implies that something is wrong.  It’s not something that needs to be.  It is simply an outside force acting…

Asking For Help

Therapy Tuesday was a big day in my world.  It was moving day for my ex-husband.  It was official.  He was moving out.  In some ways, it has all happened so fast.  In other ways, it has not.  I have been treading water for…