Category: abuse in families

My Borderline Mother

If you’ve read my blog in any detail, then you know by now that I have a mother who expresses her emotions and general psychology through a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder.  If I were to follow Christine Lawson’s archetypes, then I would classify… Continue Reading “My Borderline Mother”

The Red Herring Effect

I was about to hit my stride when I wrote “Your Narrative Brain and Trauma Recovery”, but then Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur came around; I became contemplative and pondered the nature of healing and what keeps us trapped in the same cycles.  What… Continue Reading “The Red Herring Effect”

Borderline Personality Disorder and Mirroring

I wrote this post, The Male Borderline Waif, a year ago, and it gets a lot of daily traffic.  For as much research that’s been accomplished over the decades around borderline personality disorder (BPD), there are still few answers to be had particularly for… Continue Reading “Borderline Personality Disorder and Mirroring”

Entitlement and Domestic Abuse

I am going to record this for a very specific reason. Sometimes people give something away in the moment, and that’s the moment that things crystalize.  That’s the insight that you needed to confirm your hypothesis.  That’s when you know that you were right.… Continue Reading “Entitlement and Domestic Abuse”

The Borderline Blame Storm

I was asked recently to write more about being in relationship with someone who expresses as having a personality disorder. Firstly, I want to be careful because I don’t want to vilify people who carry this diagnosis.  There is a lot of inflammatory rhetoric… Continue Reading “The Borderline Blame Storm”

Overcoming a Sense of a Foreshortened Future

I have been thinking about this idea of The Reboot, which I wrote about in my previous post.  Clearly, I’m not entirely empty in my old noggin.  I had an actual thought and pondered it, too! Have I ever felt like this before in… Continue Reading “Overcoming a Sense of a Foreshortened Future”

Opening The Vaults

I am still in therapy.  It’s no longer something I remotely enjoy not that I ever enjoyed sitting in the Hot Seat before.  Now, however, it’s work, and I can feel it.  I can feel myself becoming defensive when my therapist asks a question… Continue Reading “Opening The Vaults”

No Apologies

It’s the holiday season, and you know what that means.  It’s Letter from My Mother time! For those of you familiar with her, I fully expect an eye roll.  For those of you new to my blog, just roll your eyes.  She seems to… Continue Reading “No Apologies”

To Blame or Not To Blame

Truth is not easy.  Telling it, avoiding it, denying it, seeing it.  Sometimes it isn’t clear.  The truth, from my perspective, might look wildly different from someone else’s perspective.  Perspectives.  I do understand this. Perspective-taking is the bedrock of empathy.  Before you can enter… Continue Reading “To Blame or Not To Blame”

Maladaptive Perfectionism

My good friend, currently reading Brene Brown’s book I Thought It Was Just Me (but it wasn’t), insisted that I refer to her on my blog from here on out as A-Dizzle.  Request granted.  A-Dizzle never fails to send me outstanding quotes.  This morning… Continue Reading “Maladaptive Perfectionism”